Since today is World Suicide Prevention Day I thought I'd share my story with everyone. I think I've shared it before but it's worth sharing again.
A few years back I fought with the thought of taking my own life. Like millions of other people in this World, I thought that people would be better off with out me. I woke up every morning with the feeling of being a burden to everyone around me. That feeling stuck with me all day long until it was time to lay back down and go back to sleep. Every day I had the same thoughts. "If I wasn't here then nobody else would have to deal with me and all the garbage that I'm putting them through" - For those of you feeling this way, you are not alone in your thoughts. There's an entire group of people that feel the exact same way that you do.
Yes, the thought of taking my own life has crossed my mind. Yes, I fought with the idea of suicide.
Well, I'm here to tell you that there is a way out of that "hole" that you feel stuck in. For me? It was the simple thought of my 2 daughters. How could I be so selfish to think that their lives would be easier if I wasn't here? I would sit and stare at them both and think "How can I even think about leaving them when they both need me so much?" They have so much to learn, they have so much to accomplish. How could I possibly think of not being around for that? I had plenty of people helping me along the way, telling me that things would be better. Telling me that other people deal with the same kind of stuff in their lives. For real, I didn't want to hear any of that. I didn't care what the other people were dealing with. I didn't care that I was one of many people that felt the way I did.
For me, it took some self reassurance to get me back on track. I know that this doesn't or won't work for everyone. I'm just telling you how I dealt with it. I picked myself up and got myself back in the game, so to speak. That doesn't mean that I don't still struggle with depression. It's a daily fight but I have so many positives in my life that they have taken over all of the negatives in my life. If I feel myself getting back into that "funk" it's only for a short period of time before I pull myself out. I will not allow myself to fall back into that dark place ever again.
To those that are thinking that they aren't good enough, YOU ARE! For those who think that they're alone, YOU'RE NOT! Talk to someone about the way you're feeling. Seek help. There are so many people that care about you and you don't even realize it. You may feel that you don't matter to anyone or that the World would be better off without you. I'm here to tell you that that couldn't be any further from the truth. You are here for a reason. You could be the next great inventor. You might be the person that finds the cure for cancer. You could be meant to be something greater than all of that, you might be someones Mother or Father. Someone here needs you in their life. Someone looks forward to seeing or talking to you later today or tomorrow.
If you're not sure who you can talk to. If you don't know where to turn. You can always reach out to me. I am more than willing to listen to how you're feeling. The only thing I ask of you is that you are open to what I have to say to you. That goes for any help that you seek, you have to be willing to listen. You have to be open to advise that could help you. If you decide to reach out to me then you can email me DScott@Kiss1023.com